Four Nights- Hampton (NC) 1933 Matteson
[From: Beech Mountain Folk-Songs and Ballads by Maurice Matteson and Melinger Henry (G. Shirmer 1936).
Usually known as Four Nights Drunk. This version was sung by my grandfather Maurice Matteson at his "ballad bagging" programs in the 1950s and 1960s. There's a recording of him singing this ballad at the Library of Congress.
R. Matteson 2013]
Four Nights- Collected from the singing of Mrs. Molly Bare in Elk Park, NC on August 7, 1933.
First night when I come home,
As drunk as I could be,
I saw a horse in the stable
Where my horse ought to be.
Come here, little wifie,
Explain yourself to me.
Why is this horse in the stable
Where my horse ought to be?
You blame fool, you crazy fool,
Can't you never see?
It's only a milk-cow
My mammy give to me.
I've been living in this wide world
Forty years or more;
I never seen a milk-cow
With a saddle on before.
The second night when I come home,
As drunk as I could be,
I saw a coat hanging on the rack
Where my coat ought to be.
Come here, little wifie,
Explain yourself to me.
Why is this coat hanging on the rack
Where my coat ought to be?
You blame fool, you crazy fool,
Can't you never see?
It's only a cover-lid
My mammy give to me.
I've been living in this wide world
Forty years or more;
I never seen a coverlid
With buttons on before.
The third night when I come home,
As drunk as I could be,
I saw boots standing in the corner
Where my boots ought to be.
Come here, little wifie,
Explain yourself to me.
Why are these boots standing in the corner
Where my boots ought to be?
You blame fool, you crazy fool,
Can't you never see?
It's only a cream jar
My mammy give to me.
I've been living in this wide world
Forty years or more;
I never seen a cream jar
With booties on before.
The fourth night when I come home,
As drunk as I could be,
I saw a head lying on the bed
Where my head ought to be.
Come here, little wifie,
Explain yourself to me.
Why is this head lying on the bed
Where my head ought to be?
You blame fool, you crazy fool,
Can't you never see?
It's only a cabbage head
My mammy give to me.
I've been living in this wide world
Forty years or more;
I never seen a cabbage head
With a moustache on before.