A Sailor Man Came Home- Lockley (CA) 1923 Gordon
[From: The Robert W. Gordon "Inferno" Collection in the Archive of Folk Song, Library of Congress.
The 'Inferno' collection consists of original correspondence and typescript copies of letters (200 pages) that either Gordon or someone else separated out -- because of their bawdy and scatological subject matter -- from the materials he received and compiled as first head of the folklife department at the Library of Congress. Prefaced to the 'Inferno' collection is a 14 page index which lists informant, date, location and title of the texts. It can be viewed on-line here:
http://www.horntip.com/html/books_&_MSS/1910s/1917-1933_gordon_inferno_collection_(MSS)/index.htm
R. Matteson 2013]
A Sailor Man Came Home- 394; 3; L.C. Lockley, Berkeley, California, 5/--/23;
A sailor man came home one night as drunk as drunk could be,
He saw a hat upon the rack where his hat ought to be.
"My dear wife, my sweet wife, my darling wife," says he,
"What means this hat upon the rack, where my hat ought to be?"
"O, you poor fool, you damn fool, you son of a bitch," says she,
"It's nothing but a piss pot that my granny sent to see."
"O I've travelled over land and sea, and pissed on every shore,
But a piss pot on a hat rack, I've never seen before."
A sailor man came home one night as drunk as drunk could be,
He saw a head upon the bed, where his head ought to be.
"My dear wife, my sweet wife, my pretty wife," says he,
"What means this head upon the bed, where my head ought to be?"
"O you poor fool, you damn fool, you son of a bitch," says she,
"It's nothing but a cabbage head my granny sent to me."
"O I've travelled over land and sea, and pissed on every shore
But a cabbage head with whiskers on, I've never seen before.
A sailor man came home one night, as drunk as drunk could be,
He saw an ass upon the bed, where his ass ought to be.
"My dear wife, my sweet wife, my pretty wife," says he,
What means this ass upon the bed, where my ass ought to be?"
"O you poor fool, you damn fool, you son of a bitch," says she,
"It's nothing but two loves of bread, my granny sent to me."
"O I've travelled over land and sea, and pissed on every shore,
But loaves of bread with shit between, I've never seen before."
A sailor man came home one night, as drunk as drunk could be,
He found a thing, within the thing, where his thing ought to be.
"My dear wife, my sweet wife, my pretty wife," says he,
"What means this thing, within the thing, where my thing ought to be?"
"You poor fool, you damn fool, you son of a bitch," says she,
It's nothing but a rolling pin, my granny sent to me."
"O I've travelled over land and sea, and pissed on every shore,
But a rolling pin, with balls upon, I've never seen before.